Innovation

Necessity is the mother of invention. This proverb was proved true tonight in my apartment. I'm not much of a food planner. Usually it is the last thing on my mind until those pangs of hunger start to interrupt my thoughts. I'm cruising through a book or movie or blog post and then suddenly my brain sez, "Go eat some food or I'll make you uncomfortable for the next ten minutes." Sometimes I throw down and call its bluff. Show me what you got! Usually it's not bluffing.

However, the lazy portion of my brain (~97%) tells me not to worry. The hunger will subside and you can go back to whatever you were doing without ever having to get up. This is a constant internal struggle. Most of the time I do end up going into the kitchen and look for something to prepare for a voyage down my gullet. I look in the fridge, then the cupboards, then the freezer, then the fridge again (just in case I missed something). I'll get an idea of what I have, but nothing happens right away. I'll need some time to think about it. Usually the main debate is whether or not I'll have to wash a pot or pan that won't fit into the dishwasher. It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.

So, eventually when I do decide to open a can of beans, heat them in the microwave and pour them over some hot dog buns that might go bad in a few hours, I call it a victory. But tonight I had a little obstacle. What happens when extra-container ingredients are required? I mean, perishables usually perish in my kitchen due to my lack of interest in consuming them in a timely manner. Tonight I chose to fix macaroni and cheese. This requires a box of the stuff, some butter or margarine and the tiniest bit of milk. I went ahead and started boiling the water and cooking the pasta before I decided to see if I had any milk.

Much to my swearing chagrin, there was none on hand. What's to be done? Wait, what's that in the back corner of the fridge? I must have forgot about it, behind the beers, next to the hot dogs, baby carrots and apple butter. It was also obscured by the giant crock pot of salsa queso looming in the foreground, always demanding my attention, but never getting any love (it's over a week old and I'm just not turned on by it anymore). This hidden ingredient savior was nothing but a simple carton of chocolate soy milk. I didn't have time to ask myself how the hell that got in there. I only paused a second before I added it to the mix, pondering what the coloring would do to the macaroni. It turns out that the sauce became just a little more orange.

What could this concoction possibly taste like? It tastes just like it sounds...delicious! Actually, it tasted like macaroni and cheese with the tiniest hint of chocolate. Let this be a lesson to you - if you're in a bind, then don't be afraid to use unusual ingredient substitutes. It might turn out to be the greatest thing ever. Unfortunately, my macaroni and cheese didn't fit this bill. It was okay, mind you, but nothing to have on the Food Network or anything. But I do have a great substitute for spaghetti sauce if you're in a pinch...